Don’t You Think I Would, If I Could?

I wish there was a switch inside my head,
Something that could turn my thoughts off.

I wish I could be content with silence,
That I didn’t crave constant stimulation.

I long for a day when I am not scared of the thoughts my mind can produce,
For a time when calmness is not ominous.

I wish I could turn it off,
But then I wonder where I’d be without it.

I love being able to connect with people on deep levels,
To create lasting and meaningful relationships.

I understand people for what they are and I meet them there,
Even though we are different.

You may think I’d change it all if I could,
That I would wave my magic wand and make it all disappear- make myself feel normal.

There are days that I wish that,
Where I crave an escape from the patterns of my life.

But then the sun shines in,
And I have a good day.

I have been shaped into the person I am,
Thanks to the dark days.

There are reasons I am different,
You think that I may wish to change them, and sometimes I’d agree
But sometimes things aren’t that easy, and because of it all-

I am me.

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